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My journey of personal growth

Anonymous

Las montañas se encuentran con el lago

Since I was a little girl, I have always regarded myself as an independent person that could do everything on their own, and I must admit that I genuinely believed I could until I crashed with myself. Being an only child and with parents that are fully committed to their jobs, I was raised believing that one's best company should be oneself and that one should learn to be alone. Also, I grew believing that the best way of protecting oneself is not allowing others too much into one's life as the only way of hurting someone is by knowing them.


Although right now, I recognize it was not the best strategy to confront life, I must admit that it worked for me perfectly. It was perfectly okay for me to spend hours doing schoolwork all by myself as I didn’t seem to notice the solitude, and even though I had friends that cared for me, I tried to abstain myself from showing too much of how I was as I was really scared of what they might think. I thought that I could have everything under my control, and that if ever something went wrong, it would be perfectly easy for me to make everything right in a small amount of time.


Everything was fine until the pandemic arrived, and I realized that I had been living completely wrong. During the first few months of the quarantine, I tried to remain positive about the whole situation. But as time passed, I started to lose control of myself and became extremely anxious and desperate as there was nothing I could do to change my circumstances. I must admit that those were really hard times for me and that it took me a while before I was able to reconnect with myself. During that time, I completely disconnected from the only friend I had and consecrated myself to study as it was the only thing that could keep my mind busy. The worst of all is that I completely lost myself and my true identity. I didn't even recognize myself, and it amazed me how it was possible that someone could change that much in a small amount of time.


It took me a while to recognize that I needed to change my way of living and accept that as human beings, we cannot control the things that happen in our lives rather than how we react to them. This personal crisis helped me understand that it is perfectly okay to not be fine all of the time and that it is okay to seek help when one really needs it. During this time, I learned that there is nothing wrong with being alone, but that it is also important to have strong relationships that help you when you are not at your best.


Thankfully, this hard moment of my life allowed me to rediscover myself and to understand that there is nothing wrong in showing how one truly is as long as one feels comfortable doing so. Furthermore, I became more grateful for all of my friends that stuck with me despite my rough time and supported me when I most needed it as well as for those new friends that I've gotten the opportunity to meet during this pandemic and that have become really important to me.


I know it is hard to find the bright side of things when everything seems as it is collapsing; however, I come to tell you that everything has a reason for happening. There is always an opportunity for growth, self-discovery, or just to stop being so self-centered in what one thinks it is important to take a minute and appreciate everything that one has.

personal growth: Sobre nosotros

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